heyy.. ahh i really dunno what to say.. many times before i have thought about blogging this but i think at this rate i'd never do it so i'll do it now..

its happened again. had a bloody stupid feeling in my chest when going home today. why? i dont know.maybe i should wonder something in return.

Is it because of where i am now that i've actually might have changed for the worse? idunno.. seriously. people say now that even my character has changed and they miss the way i used to be last year.

but last year when thinking about the big question that would probably change my life a lot, i was doubting whether to go for it would be a wise choice. but if i'm not wrong my parents they opened my mind to the new possibilities and i was convinced that this was all part of god's will

point is that maybe it was time to change for the better. but i dunno... after all the trying and pitfalls, i dont know but i think its still dort of my fault that things are the way they are. but the issue being addressed here is that i dunno but is all this starting to affect the way i behave? even my parents and very good friends are telling me theres something different about the way i am now.. and i really hope not. cause i want things to stay as much the same as last year as possible..

sigh... i dunno i also hope the C.I.A. gets moving somewhere too.. its depressing.. havent had a proper prayer session for ages and for the past few months i think almost the only topic of conversation i've had was about.. you know what..

i dont know.. i gope i get sown the way of balancing my life properly soon..

maybe its time to open up the purpose driven life again..
posted by halfpastfour- at 6:31 PM [edit]